Who wants this, me or my mom?

"Smile bigger! Stand up straight shoulders back! Look cute!" I basically hear those sayings every five minutes of my life. If I'm not practicing a routine with my mom, getting my hair done with my mom or picking outfits out with my mom, I'm usually sleeping. Ever since i was 3 years old I have been in beauty pageants, i cant remember doing anything else but beauty pageants. I couldn't tell you how many towns I've traveled to on weekends just for a pageant but up until now it all just felt like a normal life, and that i wanted it. But recently i feel like my mom wants to win a competition more than i do.
I mean I have never really had a childhood of just doing normal things with the other kids, i was always having to look my best or practicing my routines for competition day. Then on competition day it was just a day of having to look perfect and being judged by the way my hair looked, smile, makeup, or stance was. And to think of it what kind of sport was this anyways? More and more competitions i see little girls from ages newborn to 18 done up in all this make up, spray tans, fake teeth, and sparkly outfits. When were 3 years old do we really want to do this? Were we the ones that chose to be in beauty pageants, because i know when i was three i had no idea what was going on. My mom had brought me up into this hobby and lifestyle, i cant say i really had a choice in what activity, hobby or sport i wanted to be apart of. Now that I`m older i realized a lot about beauty pageants, and if i could of chosen a hobby or sport this would not of been one. Being made into some perfect little girl that your not and being judged on every little move you make just doesn't seem right to me. How can making 8 year old girls look like their 20 with all the make up and fake eyelashes or teeth on really be a hobby they choose.
Its like were always looking to be number one or perfect in life, trying to critic every little flaw our appearances have, when in reality no one is ever going to be perfect, someones always wishes they had something else that another person had. But moms in beauty pageants dont see it that way, its more of if you come in first and win the crown then you are perfect compared to the other girls you were against, your perfect out of all of them because the judges picked you. Then off to another competition with different girls to see if your seen as “perfect” there too. I feel almost as a trophy child like my mom can show me off to her friends telling them about how i won because i was prettier than all the other girls and their daughters dont have this to show. One day i hope girls that have been in beauty pageants since they were little finally realize if hey this is truely what they love doing for a hobby or if it is what your parents want, because at age 3 does the little girl really have a say in what she is doing with her life?

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/features/2469241/Mum-gives-daughter-adult-makeover-for-beauty-pageant.html